The Diagnosis- Part 1 Heather’s Perspective

This blog post is part of the continuing story of our family’s journey facing my husband’s cancer with grace that only the Lord Jesus can give. If you would like to read the story from the beginning, go here.

There are just some things you can never be prepared for, and cancer is one of them. The moment Dan discovered those lymph nodes above his collar bone, our life began to change. We have known people who have gone through cancer. We’ve felt compassion for them and prayed for them, but looking back, we just had no clue of all they were going through.

Someone sent Dan a wonderful article about this. The author recounts the Doctor telling her that she had breast cancer. She said to the doctor, “I don’t know how to have cancer.” He put his hand on her shoulder and said, “None of us does.” How right he was!

From the first time I felt the lumps on Dan’s neck, and along his collar bone, I instinctively knew that something was very wrong. I was relieved that he took it seriously enough to make a doctor’s appointment the next day, but in some ways it also scared me. That meant that he was worried too. Like most men, Dan was an expert at blowing off medical concerns. He went kicking and screaming to the doctor for his headaches, and they were affecting his life in a major way. Somehow this was different.

October 25, 2012 began a journey that we never dreamed we would be on. As we sat in the waiting room, so many thoughts ran through my mind. Usually, I was the patient. I have Rheumatoid Arthritis and Fibromyalgia, so I was a “frequent flier,” in the clinic. I was thankful that my husband’s primary doctor was an Internist. I felt certain that he would take our concerns seriously, and would figure out what was wrong. The nurse called my husband’s name and brought him back to the scales. She took his blood pressure and his temperature. Everything looked normal on paper. This gave me an irrational sense that the entire notion of something being wrong was a mistake- an overreaction.

Once all of the pre-visit charting had been done by the nurse, Dr. H came in and shook our hands asking the reason for the appointment. Dan explained the lumps he had discovered. The doctor had him remove his button down shirt, and hop onto the exam table. I carefully studied the doctor’s expressions and reactions, as he palpated Dan’s neck. His fingers began to feel under Dan’s earlobes, and moved down his neck to his collar bones. Despite his professional manner, and not reacting strongly, I saw something in his face- seriousness and intense concentration, which signaled that we had done the right thing by coming in. He asked about symptoms, “Any cough?”

“No.”

“Any pain?”

Dan began to explain the severe back pain he had been experiencing for the last couple of weeks. It had gotten so bad that I couldn’t hug him without hurting him. We had assumed that he had pulled a muscle, but it wasn’t improving, even with ibuprofen and acetaminophen.

The doctor immediately ordered a battery of tests, starting with complete blood work. He asked if we had time to stay for more tests, and then ordered a chest x-ray and an ultrasound of other possible tumor sites. Every test result was a new blow until the final diagnosis was made.

The results from the blood work came back quickly. Dr. H explained that they were normal for the most part; however they did show high tumor markers which suggested cancer. He said because of the way the numbers looked, he was able to rule out things like lymphoma and leukemia. Then he turned to the x-ray results. The X-ray showed a spot on the lung which could have been anything from a tumor to benign scar tissue. We pressed him for some straight information on what to expect.

“I can tell you this: It is serious.” His words would play through our minds like a broken record for the next couple of weeks as we went to two to three appointments a day, nearly every day. These appointments began with a CT scan the next day.

You can learn more about Dan Erickson, his family, and his ministry at his blog, “Dan’s Pulpit.” Follow “Facing Cancer With Grace,” to read our continuing story.